Touching lives

Somewhere I read about a man's death.
Seemingly insignificant was his life as one looked.
But hundreds mourned his death,
he had touched a cord somewhere with them.
He made their student hostel life a little more jolly and colourful.
Milon da was no more.
I did not know him.
Apparently, cancer took him away.
Students from Jadhavpur University were sad today.
They missed their Milon da.
They missed his food, his stories, his smiling face.
He touched their lives.
Millions of people touch our lives.
We humans make memories.
And in the end that's what we remain.
Dust and memories.
Remember the Milon da of your life,
before death takes them away.

Sunshine

Sunshine is not far away.
Rays break through the darkness,
the crown shines under the sunshine.

When you are losing hope,
the rays will see you through.

Take a walk in the park,
your mind will find its way through.
Continue to dream my friend,
Ov'r there rests your destiny.

Remember the time,
today was a dream, yesterday.
The darkness looms large,
it's grippin' my fear.

When you are losing hope,
the rays will see you through.

Badlaav

Pakki dhoop subah ka rukh dekh rahi thi,
Kuch kaagaz, kuch samaan nikaale maine us bag se.
Aaj badlaav ka din hai, theharaav ka darr hai mujhe.
Par waqt badalta rahega. Is samay ke peeche bhi ek badlaav tha.
Insaan baahri badlaav se itna darta kyun hai?
Hawa, paani, baadal, sab badalte hi toh rehte hai.
Sab kuch thehera hua sa lagta hai par aandhi toh aane waali hai.
Main bhi badal rahi hu, main badal chuki hu.

Waiting

The long wait has begun. As I wait every month for the final verdict to come on our paperwork, it makes me think so intensely inward. I am obsessed to know my future, is it bleak, is it bright? Am I happy in the picture of tomorrow?
It's strange how every moment can be so captivating. Funny that I'm manically searching astrology predictions everyday, half believing them.
The surface seems so calm, so unperturbed. But there is a great battle waging inside. I have let go of my body, my diet and my mind. It is so easy to fall back on past habits. Mindless acts have become the norm. My to-do list is ever increasing. My skills are depleting. Mind is forgetting words. It's like I'm suddenly ageing at a rapid pace. There are days when I'm stuck in a mindless cycle of rising from the bed, watching reruns of popular sitcoms and stuffing my mouth with whatever I get my hands on.
I know it's wrong. All these little acts are reflecting on my body, my mind and my speech. The excitement of changing base is combined with a gripping fear of being left out of the race. The race to excel, make my own name. I question my principles, my thought process and my dreams. I wasn't meant to be like this. A younger me had long before promised that I will not remain like this. I was suppose to have changed and for the better. But today I feel like a bloated blob. I won't give up, that's for sure. But I feel stuck to even put up a fight.
I'm writing frequently. That's the only positive I see these days. Writing is the best thing in the world to me today. It is like letting out steam. I fearlessly and shamelessly write down my thoughts, my mental and physical condition. I'm in a very bad shape right now but I don't want to be stuck here. I want to grow, feel beautiful again. Pick up my pieces and paint a bright picture for myself.
I have hope, lots and lots of hope. I know my gloom is temporary. I am in passing. But I'm permanently damaging my beautiful body and in the process damaging my confidence. It's difficult to stay on track. 

Under the Italian Sun

Living a dream,

Hopping onto the plane to a wonderful place.

Dhanashree, you are going to a magical land,

It’s time to make memories,

Time to eat and lose the mental flab.

Pizzas and Pasta, Collosums and Towers await you

Spread your wings,

Embrace the change

You asked the heavens and destiny lent a hand

Grow, learn and run wild and free.

Buon Viaggio!

To greener pastures, a new sky

Unexplored roads.

New sunshine to lit your face

Dhanashree, you are onto a unique journey

Journey of happiness

Deep down it will hurt,
When I will look back at my life.
Because it is my own ambitious mind
That speaks to me.
It is my own illusional greatness that questions my existence.
You are a mere catalyst, dear love.
For it is I who seeks my own fame.

It is I who is repulsed by mediocrity yet
thrives in it.
I am my own critic.
That's the thing with disillusioned, ambitious people.
I don't know what I seek.
But I am sure to arrive one day.

Spending countless hours reading the inner workings of their minds.
Sorting, analysing every word,
every action.
Always wondering, what is it the mind speaks that words don't let out.
Sorry are the souls who seek happiness
In arriving not knowing the route to embark upon.
I'll be picking up my small pieces of big ambition now.
Promising to start my journey.
Destination will find itself,
All roads come to their end.
Along the way, I shall seek happiness.
Thriving in the journey, not awaiting my place.
As one day when my being is kissed by ashes, my soul will smile with serenity.

महीने के वह दिन...

सैलाब एक उमड़ आता है दर्द का,

नैनों से मोती बरसते रहे।

वह ना समझ पाए मेरी इस टिस को,

ना मैं उन्हें कुछ कह पाउ।

बस एक कोना देदो अपने दिल में,

सिमट  के  रहने  दो मुझे उधर।

बुलंद है आज भी यह आवाज़,

कुछ दिन चुप रहने दो मुझे। 

महीने के वह दिन,

आँसू बहने दो मेरे।